d Pardon My Juice: Pardon My Juice

Tuesday, February 28

Pardon My Juice

Consider the difference between the following two sentences:

"Would you like to come to my house?"

"Would you like to come at my house?"

The difference being a vowel and its location. The meanings of these two sentences are dramatically different.

In the first sentence, a person is being invited over for any innumerable reasons, one of which could be to come. The other is exact. There are, generally speaking, only a few activities that could produce the desired result. The result, however, is precise.

It's these little tightropes we walk without knowing them that create such headaches in everyday living.

"Tuck me in."
"Suck me in."

"Sit there and be still."
"Sit there and be shrill."

"Do you love your mother?"
"Do you shove your mother?"

"Care to eat some stew?
"Care to beat some Stu?"

"In which country does your family reside?"
"In which country can your family reside?"

"That's a witty and kind gesture."
"That's a witty and kind molsetor."

"Do you enjoy a good duck?"
"Do you enjoy a good fuck?"

And so forth. And I'm done.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

I feel like these grammatical situations don't result in headaches, but rather are a testament to the glory of language precision.

I enjoyed this post.

It reminds me of this:

12:46 a.m.  

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