d Pardon My Juice: The Death Penalty

Sunday, January 29

The Death Penalty

I really don't understand the death penalty.

Why do we punish people for murdering by mudering them?

Aren't we just condoning the act we're trying to condemn them for?

That's why I think all murderers should be raped.

Get a big, beefy prison guard with a lot of issues about his father and too much hair on his arms, feed him some Viagra, lock the couple in the gas chamber and just let the security guard have some fun.

And, you know, since we were going to kill him already--it's not like the murderer has any rights left--prisons could make an extra buck or two selling the video on a website.

Wouldn't it be more satisfying for the victim's family? They could be in the little gallery and watch the guy really, you know, be in pain. None of this lethal injection stuff, where the prisoner silently and coldly and clinically stops moving but the guy could run around the little chair and the guard would have to catch him and get him into the right position and really just go to town.

I suppose, afterwards, we could kill 'em. I mean, really, who cares? They were taught the lesson they deserve.


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