"Hey Olde Fashion!"
Yesterday I was on my usual Thursday Afternoon Jog around campus. It was a beautiful Monday morning and I saw my olde timey friend Pirate Gabe. Gabe’s an olde fiend of mine from the days when the Internet was new, and gangbang wasn’t an everyday word. As I said, Gabe’s a Pirate. The kind of Pirate you’d bring home to your family, unless you have lots of gold coins lying around your home. That’d just be an accident waiting to happen. He has a wooden leg and eats two steaks with every meal. He once told me it was for spiritual practices, but I didn’t believe Robot Jesus was into food. Anyways, Gabe tells me that there is a reunion going on at our olde timey skool for the misunderstood and misspelled. All our olde schoolmates would be there and I should come along. It was sure to be a blast. The four P’s for sure: Pie, pizza and plenty of punching. Well I sure wanted to come, but there’s this dumb thing called an INVITATION that I didn’t receive. Call me olde fashion (“Hey Olde Fashion!”) Yes…yes….oh, sorry. As I was saying, I think an invitation is the polite way to invite a person to attend a gathering. Whether it be a party, a Bris, or a Good Olde Fashion Hanging. Invitations are the way to go. It’s NOT that had. You want some one to come, INVITE THEM. If not, fuck ‘em.